Alone... to be or not to be... this is my question?

Are you one who enjoys being alone? Or do you enjoy companionship at all costs! I have always loathed being alone, yet, I am alone most of the time. I work by myself most of the time, write by myself all the time & truly have no one close to me who fully understands my drive to write and basically create musically & artistically. I have no one with whom to work with while writing music. I don't spend much time with many artistic friends, nor, do I have anyone in my family other than my mother who is actually creative. I feel that spending time alone can be a curse at times and a blessing others. It is nice to have a bit of time to yourself to reflect and gather your thoughts, rediscover yourself etc. However, for me this subject is like a double edged sword. I like to have time to think deeply by myself. However, I feel a great need to spend time with my wife and family. Time which I do not have enough of. Seems to slip by and each day I awake seems to eventually play out much like the last. I am basically a workaholic, when I am not working I am thinking about what needs to be done. So, I could be spending the day with my wife while she is shopping and secretly, I can't wait to get back and get this list done. By the way, this list starts in my head and eventually sleeps in my bed. I spend many nights tossing and turning either prior to falling asleep or after having have been asleep for some time, only to awake to another sleepless night with "The List". At times I will either write it down or record myself a memo on my phone for later review, however, that is not always how it works, there are many times in which I start thinking of more and more items to add to "The List" and here is where I spend the rest of my night. I do find that I am more productive when left to my own devices. But then again, there are many times in the past I have felt as if I have driven myself to the very brink of insanity, while left alone to my own devices, deep within thought. Most of the time I feel as if I am very much alone in my world, there are so many of life's situations and circumstances, which I truly feel that I am the only one who is able to fully understand and or complete these tasks accurately. Most of my family seem to occupy themselves with meaningless chitchat and are not quite as driven as I. They don't seem to want to take on the heavy issues, it seems they are drawn to issues of levity. I understand that I am very much alone in my world when it comes to dwelling within analytical thought.